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Posts Tagged ‘Turkish Grand Prix’

Red Bull Turkey shunt explained

Red Bull Turkey shunt explained

Red Bull engineer’s have discovered what caused the embarrassing collision between Mark Webber and Sebastian Vettel while the two were cruising to a 1-2 finish in Sunday’s race.

On board footage show’s Vettel’s car, Randy Mandy, suddenly and unexpectedly turning in… on Webbers motor, Bruce. 

At first the blame was  laid at Sebastian’s door but detailed analysis of Mandy’s telemetry shows that it is actually her time of the month and she was in a foul mood with Bruce, who like all men in such a situation, was blissfully unaware of this until Mandy ‘went off on one’.

Said a Red Bull team member, “We looked at the data on Mandy and discovered that Liverpool were playing at home and that earlier in the week Bruce had left the toilet seat up, this was simmering with her until lap 41 of the Turkish Grand Prix when she finally exploded, giving poor old Bruce both barrels.”

The team are confident that Mandy will be randy again in time for the Canadian round in two weeks time and normal service will be resumed.

Sauber get an F-ing point at last..

Sauber get an F-ing point at last..

When McLaren invented the F-duct, it was named as such as it was on the ‘F’ of Vodafone on the front of the car. Does this mean Sauber’s version is called a ‘Sodding big white space with no sponsors duct’?

Lewis Hamilton – Diamond Geezer

Lewis Hamilton – Diamond Geezer

Pounding around Monaco with a diamond encrusted steering wheel has obviously had an affect on Lewis Hamilton as he has turned up in Turkey sporting a large pair of diamond earrings.

It wasn’t that long ago that Force India’s Vitantonio Liuzzi… had to remove his eyebrow ring as it was deemed to be in contravention of rule 2.2.1 of the sporting regulations banning piercings and necklaces on safety grounds, plus they said it made him look like a twat.

However, there seem to be no such concern’s over Lewis turning into the motoring equivalent of Puff Daddy though the earrings are expected to be removed before qualifying as the weight of them is said to cost more than a tenth of a second a lap.

Now Turkish fans desert football

Now Turkish fans desert football

Following the disastrous turn out for the Turkish Grand Prix, the credit crunch now starts to affect football crowds.

Good news for McLaren?

Good news for McLaren?

 

Istanbul Park, Saturday. After failing to make it through Qualifying 1 - again, McLarens Lewis Hamilton told the world “We’ve lost our way with this car, we probably should have scrapped it a long time ago” which must have cheered… his team up no end - even though he is probably right.

However, there is a morsel of good news on the horizon, as under the new car scrappage scheme introduced by the UK Government, McLaren will get £2,000 towards the cost of their next car if they send the MP4 -24 to the crusher.

Said a spokesman for the Department of Transport; “Normally the car would need to be over 10 years old to qualify for the scheme, but we recognise that it would be for the good of the nation to put this particular dog out of its misery now

Cheer up McLaren - it could be worse…

Cheer up McLaren - it could be worse...

 

With Lewis Hamilton already a whopping 42 points behind Jenson Button, with only a quarter of the season gone, it seems that McLaren are considering giving up this year as a bit of a bad idea, to concentrate on preparing for 2010 instead. Thats $400 million well spent then.

According to Spanish newspaper ‘El Pais’, McLaren boss Martin Whitmarsh reckons that the MP4-24 is not going to shine at aerodynamically-demanding tracks like next weekend’s Turkish GP venue.

So, it won’t work at fast, open tracks like Istanbul Park and it wasn’t too mesmerising around a non-aero circuit like Monaco either. OK – now we get the point about giving it all up for 2009.

With Mercedes apparently showing interest in branding the all conquering Brawn GP car, Whitmarsh applauds the success of the new team, but points out that the team’s car is based on former owner Honda’s efforts over 18 months, comprising “four wind tunnels and hundreds of millions of dollars“.

Sounds like a bit of an excuse to us, but Martin should look on the brightside. The management at Honda, who decided to ditch the F1 effort five minutes before the Brawn glory started, must be seriously more hacked off than he is…

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