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Posts Tagged ‘Toyota’

Toyotal Recall

Toyotal Recall

Stefan GP’s plans to nick Campos’ place on the Bahrain grid have been dealt a blow as Toyota have recalled their cars due to a technical glitch.

Toyota engineers have discovered that despite building dozens of F1 machines that contested 140 races… over 8 years at a total cost of a gazillion dollars, that the cars never actually won anything.

The vehicles have been sent back to the factory and in the meantime Stefan have been lent a couple of Yaris courtesy cars.

Hands up time – the Toyotal Recall headline was pinched from @sniffpetrol

Bernie Ecclestone discovers new art talent

Bernie Ecclestone discovers new art talent

Debra Murphy of Class 4, St Ethel’s Junior School, Swindon, is suddenly in demand from people wanting portraits that bear no resemblance to themselves, following her recent commission to do Bernie Ecclestone’s 2009 christmas card.

Debra, 14, was chosen from a… shortlist of four very bad artists to produce the card depicting Max Mosley, BMW’s Mario Theissen and Toyota’s John Howett sailing away in a yacht. She was going to include the Bridgestone boss but could not recall his name let alone what he looked like.

The boat-load sailing away from F1 are waved off by the remaining team bosses with Bernie watching from the lifeguard station, while for some reason Flavio Briatore prepares to launch a rocket attack from a nearby rowing boat.

For good measure there are sharks circling and F1 cars racing in the distance.

We don’t know what Debra is on but we’d certainly like some of it to get Christmas going…

 

bernie1

Toyota WERE the best at something in F1

Toyota WERE the best at something in F1

Toyota may have spent years plodding around the midfield to little or no effect but at least its accounts department were the best in F1. According to a report by business analysts, Dun and Bradstreet, Toyota were the most reliable… team in F1 when it came to paying its bills on time, on average paying suppliers five days early.

The study, published in Auto Moto und Sport, says that other teams were not quite so quick to get the cheque book out, with McLaren taking around 26 days to cough up with Force India bottom of the grid on 66 days.

Well done Toyota – you showed ‘em.

Toyota ask Stefan GP – Can we have our car back please?

Toyota ask Stefan GP – Can we have our car back please?

Now that points will be available right down to tenth place, Toyota ask if they can come back next year for another go.

Say hello, wave goodbye…

Say hello, wave goodbye...

Following the departure of Honda, BMW, Bridgestone, Toyota and more sponsors than you could crash a Renault at, F1 has today announced that it is to withdraw from itself. F1 said today that you could pick any one of the… rubbish excuses given by the others (it’s the recession, we have achieved all we can, we are concentrating on our core business, we are being more green, we could not beat Douglas Bader in a one-legged race etc) but that the decision was final. 

The car in front never was a Toyota

The car in front never was a Toyota

Toyota auditors, preparing for the closure of the F1 team, have found a huge, almost completely empty room at the squads Cologne HQ. There was puzzlement as to what it was for before they realised it was the trophy cabinet.

Fishy business for Kobayashi

Fishy business for Kobayashi

Kamui Kobayashi has revealed that until he stepped in at Toyota for the injured Timo Glock, his racing career was all but over due to a lack of money. Having spent all his yen competing in GP2, Kamui has said… that his fall back plan was to go back to work in his father’s sushi restaurant.

Sadly for him, the Toyota board meet in a couple of weeks, to decide whether or not to stay in F1 and if the signs are anything to go by then poor old Kobayashi may as well get ready for a life of putting bits of raw fish on a little conveyor belt..

Kimi to be let on timeshare basis for 2010?

Kimi to be let on timeshare basis for 2010?

With the list of teams expressing an interest in hiring Kimi Raikkonen next year growing by the day, the driver’s management have hit on a lucrative solution that should keep everybody happy. Apparently, the plan is to sell shares in… the Ferrari reject on a timeshare basis not dissimilar to that operated by holiday companies.

Raikkonen will spend the first half of the year with McLaren and the latter part of the summer with Toyota with Lotus and Campos getting a half term holiday each. The Finn, who comes complete with a swimming pool and yacht, will also be available for weekends away in the off season.

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