
“You are just an employee, Can you confirm you understand the message?”


We have been passed what could possibly be a genuine transcript of the pit to car radio transmission at the German Grand Prix between Ferrari race engineer, Rob Smedley, and their number two driver, Felipe Massa.
We join the action on lap… 47 as Smedley calls on Massa..
Rob Smedley: “Aye oop lad, how’s tha doing out there?”
Felipe Massa: “OK, car is good, I’m really motoring here”
RS: “Great lad, cracking, but why not take it easy a bit, you know, chill baby”
FM: “No, I push, Fernando is close”
RS: “Aye, but driving quickly isn’t all it’s cracked up to be is it? Why not ease up a bit and take in the scenery, maybe stop for a sandwich?”
FM: “You crazy? Alonso is all over me, do I need to push more?”
RS: “Look lad, ordinarily yes, but don’t you think it would be a nice idea to look after the car a bit, it’s a dead expensive bit of kit and you really don’t want to thrash it all afternoon do you?”
FM: “What are you saying?”
RS: “Oh fer chrissakes man, will yer just bloody well pull over and let Alonso past, Jeez, have you finally understood the message.”
FM: “Oh *#%+ it!”


Luca di Montezemolo demonstrated his driving skills yesterday by parking a Ferrari in a gravel trap, with his two bemused race drivers perched on the back. Class. (see video)


As is so often the case at Ferrari, the team seems to have more drivers on its books than it has seats available. Rumours persist, that despite having Kimi Raikkonen and Felipe Massa contracted for 2010, they have also signed… Fernando Alonso and are keen on having Michael Schumacher joining in too. Can anybody at that team count?
So, four into two does not go but the solution is simple. Ask their good mates at the FIA to allow them to run a third car for Schuey and (if you believe the Italian press) pay Kimi Raikkonen £12 million to naff off and go rallying.
Now, where do they put Valentino Rossi….?


Grand Prix Diary is back from its cycling odyssey across northern France, which ended in a sports bar in Paris with the Tour de France coming past just ten feet away and with the Hungarian Grand Prix on the big… screen TV. Things rarely get any better.
Sadly of course the weekend was marred by the awful accident suffered by Felipe Massa, something our merry band were blissfully unaware of until the race programme started.
We wish Felipe the very best with his recovery and we sincerely hope to see him back in action before too long.
Ferrari boss, Luca di Montezemolo put it best, when being pressed by an insensitive journalist as to who would take Massa’s place in the team, by responding; “The most important thing now is the recovery of Felipe the man, not Felipe the driver.”
Here, here.


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